End of December Status update!

Hello all!  My journey officially began the Sunday after Thanksgiving, but I wanted to wait until the end of December to update so that  I could then give status updates at the end of every month.  Well, several setbacks came along with the holidays, all in the form of junk food!  Well, as strong as my will is to get this weight off, the lure of holiday treats won over.  Add in the fact that I didn't walk as much due to the cold and various evening events and well, I didn't quite reach my first goal of thirty pounds.  I have however, reached new goals that I didn't even know that I had in the first place.  Yesterday and today I went shopping to get something to wear for a New Year's party I will be attending.  I found that I was able to go down a size in jeans AND get a smaller sized shirt!  Yeah me!  I got to purchase something from Old Navy for the first time in as long as I can remember!  It has been seven years AT LEAST since I could shop somewhere other than the plus sized specialty stores.  Now don't let that fool you, I am by no means out of the "plus sized" status and I will probably hold that title for quite awhile yet. 

Nov. 26, 2012 stats:  weight 299.6 pounds, chest 55 inches, waist 49.5 inches, hips 53 inches
Dec. 30, 2012 stats:   weight 287.6 pounds, chest 51 inches, waist 42 inches, hips 50 1/2 inches

So sparing you the torture of doing the math, here are my stats: down 12 pounds, 4 inches in my chest, 7 1/2 inches in my waist, and 2 1/2 inches in my hips.  Not too shabby if I must say so myself!

I have to say it is nice, but I really wish I would have lost more.  So that gives me motivation to push even harder this next month. 

Here are some pictures.  I tell you, I am so embarassed to show these but it is part of the process.  I cannot believe I let myself go like I had.  But I guess hind sight is 20/20 and I have to learn from my mistakes.

Well, what have I learned this month? Lots of things.

1.  I have a huge support system around me and my biggest supporters are my littlest "loved ones".  My students and my precious little Carley.  They notice even the smallest change.  And hearing my daughter tell me that she is proud of me makes me want to push that much harder.

2.  Weight is simply a number.  I have to quit obsessing about the scale and start paying more attention to the inches.  Because as my friend Tonya told me today, "When you go out you don't wear a shirt with the numbers off that stupid scale... you wear a shirt that shows your new defined curves and less belly.  That is what matters!"

3.  Even the smallest of changes can make a difference.  Eliminating sodas and eating better along with exercise (even in small amounts) does help.

4.  There are no quick fixes.  It is going to take time to get the weight off.  I can't expect it all to be gone over night.

5.  Finally and most importantly:   It can be done!  There is nothing that cannot be accomplished if you set your mind to it.  Surround yourself with positives and set obtainable goals and push yourself! 

Thank you for continuing to follow me and my weight loss journey.  Believe it or not, knowing that so many of you are reading this makes me feel more accountable and has me more motivated than ever to continue this to make myself healthier and even more beautiful of a person than I am today!

Weight Loss- Thy Name is FRUSTRATION!

I have hit a point where I am so frustrated that I can not even think straight.  I feel like no matter what I do, I am making absolutely NO PROGRESS doing this diet.  So let me quickly recap what has gone on since my last post.  I worked out both Thursday and Friday so I felt like I was doing good.  Saturday, my frustration level is beginning to grow and by Sunday I had hit my breaking point.  Carley and I went to Mom and Dad's during breakfast.  My mother, who I love dearly, pushed me over the edge.  Want to know how?  She made donuts.  Yes, donuts that I could not have.  Needless to say, I cried.  And cried.  And cried.  Now not necessarily because I was mad at mom or that I couldn't have the donut (Ok-maybe it was that a little) but more because I was so hungry and felt like there was nothing on the planet that I could eat.  

Today, my frustration continues.  I know that I am not supposed to be on the scale or measuring daily, but at this point it has become an obsession.  I feel like I have to see the weight change or the measuring tape get to cinch in a little.  Today, I got on the scale and it showed A GAIN!  Two whole pounds.  Now most people are telling me not to stress.  This could be what everyone says is "water weight".  Well to me, water weight is weight and I don't want it.

So after finding out that I have gained weight, I decided that I was going to go home and walk until my legs fell off.  I get home, I put on sweats and a thermal shirt under a tshirt and I start walking.  I made it about a quarter of a mile before I could not handle the cold wind any more.  I turned around and went and to use the treadmill.  Well that only lasted a couple of minutes because my brother has it set on too high of an incline for my athletic ability.  We have an old school treadmill.  You can't just push a button to lower the incline.  Needless to say, my frustration is CrAzY high!  But I am going to just quit listening to everybody and just start eating sensibly.  I can't take this restrictive diet crap any longer.

Thanks for listening to me piss and moan today!

A success and several setbacks...

Happy Thursday!  Today I feel like I have had several setbacks and only one success. I have to keep telling myself that I have only been on this journey less that two weeks.  For some reason, I feel like I should just wake up and be skinny.  I can feel the difference in my clothes, so that is a plus.

Well, as you read on Monday, I went to the doctor and found out that I was in a "detox mode".  So Tuesday I go to work as normal.  I start my phonics lesson with my babies (all 18 of them!) and start to feel sick.  I start sweating and felt nauseated and then it happened- yep I got sick in front of my class!  I was so glad that I had a bathroom in the classroom and that my students were in shock so they all stayed on the carpet!  So needless to say, I went home after right at an hour of work. 

Yesterday, I had a funeral visitation to attend and was unable to work out- so THREE DAYS without walking.  So today, I was bound and determined to walk today and boy oh boy did I ever!  I made it two miles- GO ME!

So I am going forward from today with the understanding that-

Diagnosis- Detox

So I went on into the doctor today just to be sure that I did not have some sort of virus that I could pass off to my students.  So the diagnosis was what I had expected.  My body is going through a detox right now.  As I am beginning to eat better and make wise and healthy decisions concerning my body, my insides are starting to try and eliminate the toxins that being overweight and making poor life choices have put into my system.

Who would have thought that weight loss could actually make you feel worse than better?  The doctor told me that I will feel like I have been hit by an eighteen wheeler for about a week while my body finishes its "detox".  Isn't that crazy?  I guess I have to come to the realization that I was an addict just like any other addict.  The only difference is that my drug of choice was food. 

For now, I am down.  I feel like I have been on this journey for way more than a week.  I want to see results.  I can see the results on paper and feel a bit of the difference in my clothes, but somehow deep down I feel like I should already see way more results.  I just have to remind myself that it took time to put on and it is going to take even more time to get off.

But even though I am feeling down and frustrated, I know that there are great things in store for me.  God has a plan and for some reason he chose this moment to push me to become the best woman I can be.

Appreciating the little things!

Good morning followers.  How much do you love my sign!  Today I am appreciating the littlest changes because a change is a change no matter how small.  I can say my week has begun with me feeling horrible.  I have chills, aches, pains, and am fatigued!  Going to go to the doctor just to be sure that it is my body reacting to all the "nasty crap" my body is trying to eliminate.  Anyways, I had to run up to the school to make sure my sub had enough work for my students. As I am driving, my seat belt keeps sliding up and rubbing along the side of my neck.  Then it hits me- duh, you are starting to lose weight and inches!!  Your seat belt doesn't need to be set so high any more- so I lowered the shoulder belt and voila!  A whole new fit!

End of week one- progress made?

Well, here we are- the end of week one.  I haven't posted much because there hasn't been much to share.  I haven't been walking, not because of lack of desire, but because my knee has decided to protest my work outs.  LOTS of pain!  So today, feeling better I thought I would try it out and see how it went.  I made it 7 tenths of a mile before I couldn't take it anymore.  So I came back to the house and plan on trying it again.

I met with a friend from high school and can't wait to share the information I got from her!  I am going to tease you all a bit and make you wait until the end of week two to share that exciting news!

So the big question is did I make any progress.  I wish I could say I felt a difference, but aside from extra energy, I don't feel any different.  Oh, and there is the lessened appetitie- which is cool.  Last night I got out the dreaded measuring tape and decided to go ahead and take my measurements.  Boy was I surprised!!  My weight will have to wait, as I used the scale that our PE teacher has in the gym.  I will go see coach in the morning and post that tomorrow night!

Day seven:
weight (Not sure until tomorrow!)
Chest- 53" ( down 2")
Waist- 46 1/2" (down 3')
Hips- 52" (down 1/2")

Can you believe that craziness?  I would never have believed it myself, but I saw it with my very own eyes!  That was quite a motivator.

What did I change this week? 

1. I stopped drinking tea and sodas completely. I do still have coffee in the morning, however instead of more sugar than coffee in my cup, I dropped the real stuff and began using a pack of splenda,
2.  Enough of all the junk!  I now have two pieces (when I can finish them) of whole wheat toast with a teaspoon of sugar free apricot preserves instead of the 700 calorie honey buns for breakfast.  I have eaten more salad this week than I have in the past year total!  Making wiser choices- GO ME!
3. I am exercising as much as possible.

Little changes- Already!

I am already noticing small changes.  This morning, for breakfast, I could not even eat all of my toast!  Normally, I could easily polish off three of four pieces of white toast and an extra large glass of milk with no problem at all.  Today, I had whole wheat toast and a small layer of strawberry sugar free jam.  I ate the first piece and was thinking "Good grief, I am never gonna get full!"  But I could barely eat HALF- yes H-A-L-F of that second piece! 

Ok, I know that seems crazy- but for me, I still am amazed at that.  Fourth day of watching what I eat and exercising and I already am noticing a decreased appetite? 

Yesterday, I managed 1.2 miles.  Thank heavens for a super long driveway, so that I can walk and eventually run without having to worry about people seeing me.  That is most definitely a luxury that I am thankful for.  Today, I started walking and for me, a mile wasn't enough.  So, I pushed it to 1.5 miles!  And is was crazy cold!

I know that I should not expect to see results for awhile, but I cannot wait to see them when they start to show up!

Day One (well, technically day 3)

So- day one in the blogging world and day three of my quest to lose this dag-blasted weight that I have been carrying around for FAR too long now!

A little background on me: I am a thirty year old, divorced (not by choice- that could be its own blog!) mother of the most beautiful little girl alive. She is my princess and I will often refer to her as such. Her name is Carley and she is five and in kindergarten.  

All of my life, I have felt like I was fat, however looking back, my weight problems didn't start full on until I began to date my now ex when I was 16 and a junior in high school.  We began dating and I quickly became comfortable eating whatever I wanted and surprise, surprise!  The weight slowly packed on right along with that eating.  The weight gain has been steady and today at just shy of 300 pounds (299.6 to be exact) it will start its decline!

What led me to this decision?. Several events had a hand in this decision. 1. I have been divorced three years now and my life is starting to get into some sort of a routine.  So it seems now would be an appropriate time to begin to work on myself.  2. I haven't really dated since the divorce and well, let's face it, no matter how beautiful you are of a person inside, that outer shell is still what everyone notices and I have come to the conclusion that even the best men will not get to know the beauty inside if the packaging isn't correctly "proportioned".  Well, at least I have not found anyone to prove me wrong yet! 3.  My health is not good. I have hypothyroidism (under active thyroid).  Actually, my doctor has said that my thyroid gland is basically "dead".  My body aches and my joints are in constant pain.  Luckily, I do not have high blood pressure or diabetes- both of which run in my family.  And finally, and most importantly 4.  My daughter came up to me last week and looked at me with her huge eyes and says, "Mommy, when are you going to lose some weight so that you can go outside and play with me?"  My heart broke.  I can't keep up with her outside! She is a ball of energy and me, well, let's just say I haven't had energy in a very long time.

So here I am! Day three of exercising and attempting to eat better.  I will be posting my stats weekly and other things through out the week.  I want this to be both a motivation for me to keep going and an inspiration to others.

Day one: weight 299.6 pounds, chest 55 inches, waist 49.5 inches, hips 53 inches (Sigh!)
Exercise: walked 1.2 miles
Goals: 1. 30 pounds gone by New Year's Eve
            2. Participate in a 5k